success Archives - Nancy Morris

Happy New Year – Part 3

I hope you have enjoyed the exercises and questions over the last few days. Remember to leverage your learning by sharing your ideas, thoughts and awareness with someone who can help you achieve your goals in 2019.

Please note that if you have not read Part 1 or Part 2 of this series, Part 3 may not make much sense. Please go back and read them now.

Okay, from Friday’s exercise, I hope you have started to create your list of tolerations so that you can zap them on the head! Yes, some will take more effort and time. Yet others, like the wallpaper hanging down, the messy car, the unfinished conversations or arguments with others, can be halted as energy-drainers much faster. You’ll be stunned at just how light you can feel by removing 25% of them!

PART III – LOOKING FORWARD INTO 2019

Now, this is where we get to have a bit more fun! Why is it more fun? Because we are in creation mode! 2019 is just about to start. And it is carte blanche, a tabula rasa, waiting for us to draw, design, sketch out and deliberately color in our lives over the coming 12 months.

So, let’s look ahead.

Whoops, don’t want to lose you now! I’m not actually talking about New Year Resolutions (which many folks will both start and stop in the next few days!). Sounds counter-intuitive, but making New Year Resolutions is not the best way to have your best year yet!

What I’m referring to, again, is an opportunity to create.

And this is a simple exercise. It is the sort of exercise that just screams ease, joy, fun, creativity. Yet it simultaneously lines up our energy to all things positive and possible in the Universe.

Okay, this exercise is a two-parter.

For the first part, you will need those 3 x 5 cards. Take out your list of tolerations from Friday’s exercise. For each toleration that you’ve not yet gotten rid of, write it down on a separate card. Remember, you wanted to remove 25% of these in the past couple of days but if you haven’t done so yet, put those 25% on the top of the pile. For the remaining 75%, I’m going to ask you to commit to zapping one toleration per week throughout 2019. You may find that you zap a lot more per week, but shoot for at least one!

For the second part of the exercise, you will once again want to find some quiet space to ponder, dream and play. This is where your imagination gets full permission to take over for a while. I also invite you to give this part of the exercise much more than 15 minutes if you can.

(If you happen to be south of the equator, just flip the following descriptions of the seasons around a bit!)

In this place of quiet and calm, cast your thoughts and energy forward into January and all the month may bring. Now, move on to February and all the fun you could have. How about March? Will you be planning your summer holidays at the same time as relishing the last days of winter?

Now, we’re into April and you can smell spring in the air. Through May, June and July – those lazy, hazy days of summer. On into August (oh, the heat!) and September and rolling through autumn into October, November (oh, the cold) and into the joys of Christmas again in December.

Think about the friends you will see, the new adventures you will have, the family visits you will enjoy. Imagine the feelings of success you will have at work, as you take command of your career and spread your wings even further.

Think of those quiet times that you will be on your own, contemplating and just enjoying who you are. Sense how you will overcome challenges that appear. Revel in the growth you will experience as you learn more about yourself and your world. Feel joy and appreciation right down the tips of your toes for all that 2019 will bring into your life.

Let your imagination roll – it has tremendous power.

Cast your mind forward one year and, pretending it is the end of December 2019, write your answers to the following questions. For the first 5, use a scale from 1 to 10, with 1 representing “definitely not” and 10 being “definitely yes” along with any additional comments you want to make:-

1. Have I lived in a way that is consistent with my values in 2019?

2. Have I taken great care of my mind, body and spirit throughout 2019?

3. Have I achieved what I set out to achieve in 2019?

4. Have I been deliberate in my actions?

5. Have I taken control to move, shape, and design my environment myself?

6. What worked really well in 2019?

7. What actions did I take that served others?

8. What am I most proud of?

9. When I look back throughout 2019, what makes me smile?

10. Who entered my life in 2019 that brings me joy?

11. What did I do that I didn’t think I could do?

Your answers to these 11 questions bring forth your goals, plans, ideas, attitudes and achievements for 2019.

What actions do you need to take right now to be able to answer these questions the way you want this time next year?

What do you need to start doing? Stop doing? Do more of?

What’s the plan?

Write it down – make it happen.

If you would like any input, support or the occasional compassionate kick in the butt (or ‘but’ that gets in your way) to get you moving, just let me know! It’s what I’m famous for!

Now, you might be saying to yourself “is that it? Is that all she is giving me in the way of tools or ideas for planning 2019?”

Yes.

Because this is all you actually need!

I’ve been studying what it takes to create success and achievement for over 25 years and one of the things I’ve come across that consistently stops people from getting where they want to go is their unnecessary need to (a) make things complicated and/or (b) look for a huge arsenal of tools, tricks and tips.

All you need you now have!

You have taken stock of 2018 and created a list of annoying things you are putting up with. Believe me, if you get rid of half of those tolerations over the next few weeks, you will create a 2019 that is filled – overflowing – with soooo much success and achievement, you will be running to my door to thank me!

And, as the icing on the cake, by answering questions 6 – 11 above, you will have proactively set your priorities, goals, targets and ambitions for a wonderful New Year.

It does not have to be any more complicated than this!

Just ask the hundreds (maybe thousands?) of people who used this program exactly one year ago!

It’s your turn now. Create 2019 as your best year yet!

Happy New Year – Part 2

What did you learn from yesterday’s exercises? What achievements appeared that surprised you?

As promised, we’re going to look at those bits and pieces that seem to hang around us, weigh us down, distract us. These are known as “tolerations” – those energy-sapping annoyances that creep into our thoughts, time, energy and space.

This toleration-zapping exercise is something you can do any time of year, but is particularly valuable around a New Year.

What tolerations are you now ready to let go of? What do you now refuse to carry in to 2019?

Let’s have a look!

(PS – if you have not yet read yesterday’s post or done the exercises, please do that now. The posts today and tomorrow won’t make much sense if done out of order.)

PART II – TOLERATIONS EXERCISE

The fundamental principle here is that we are treated the way we allow others, and the universe, to treat us. We move through life accepting less than the best from ourselves and others. And every time we tolerate or put up something that isn’t really up to our standards, we give up a little piece of ourselves.

What are you tolerating in your life right now? What are the behaviours of yourself and other people that you are putting up with? What conditions and circumstances are you bearing up under or living with that flatten your spirit, try your patience, and drain your energy?

Be very aware, as these tolerations could be so subtle or innocent they seem to be “just the way life is.” Whatever they are, they drag you down and keep you smaller than you need to be. It’s time to eliminate them!

Start this exercise by making note of everything you are tolerating. Some people start their list with that annoying bit of wallpaper that hangs down in the top corner of the bedroom that they see every night as they drift off to sleep and end the list with the dissatisfying marriage or disappointing career! Whatever … bring them to the surface but do this today (you can build on it later, but at least write something down today).

Your list could have 5 things on it or it could have 105. Doesn’t matter. Just get them written down on paper.

Okay – now a challenging request for action comes!

Identify the 25% of your list that you are prepared to get rid of, delete, toss out, discontinue, leave by the curb, resolve, finalize between now and Monday (or the next few days if you are reading this at another time).

Yup, 25%.

What things are you finally tired of carrying around?

Plan your actions into your schedule so that these tolerations are gone, outta there, old history, over the next few days.

Just imagine how much lighter, happier, healthier, alive and energized you will feel when you are 25% less burdened by energy-sapping tolerations!

In the third and final installment on Monday, we’ll be looking further into the New Year and the magic you’ll be creating! In preparation, get yourself a pack of 3 x 5 index cards or a stack of note paper (hint – the cards work best so go out and buy some this weekend if you need to). I’ll tell you more about how to utilize these in a couple of days!

Happy New Year – Part 1

Yup, its that time of year again!

2018 is rolling to a close and amidst all the parties, family, friends, shopping, snow and special TV programs, this time of year offers up the perfect opportunity to take stock of the past 12 months, clear away “schtuff” that’s simply hanging around and look forward into 2019.

Starting today with another installment tomorrow and then Monday, we’ll be looking at exactly how you can make 2019 your best year yet (at home or at the office). PS – Feel free to send these posts to your family and friends too.

And if you follow these few simple steps, you’ll get maximum benefit from the exercises I’ll be sharing with you:-

1. Take time to actually do the exercises! You won’t need to spend any more than 15 minutes on each exercise, though more is perfectly fine if you want.

2. Write down your answers, thoughts, ideas, inspirations. Whatever comes to mind. Don’t just consider it – write it down.

3. Be honest with yourself. No one needs to see or hear your replies or thoughts if you don’t want to share them. But YOU will hear them so be honest, with extra kindness and caring if need be.

4. Look for the learning. These are not exercises to provoke self-doubt or guilt but simply tools of learning.

5. Create actions from the learning. Share your new awareness with your spouse or partner, hire a coach or ask a trusted friend to help you implement some goals or action steps.

PART I – TAKING STOCK

In a quiet moment today, when you are alone and have a few minutes to yourself, write down your answers to these questions. Use a scale from 1 to 10, with 1 representing “definitely not” and 10 being “definitely yes” along with any additional comments you want to make:-

1. Have I lived in a way that is consistent with my values this year?

2. Have I taken great care of my mind, body and spirit this year?

3. Have I achieved what I set out to achieve this year?

4. Have I been deliberate in my actions?

5. Have I taken control to move, shape, and design my environment myself?

Remember, answer with honesty and without guilt. “Success” or “failure” is not the issue here. We are mining for the gold of learning through honesty.

Now, let’s change tack a bit. Over the years, I’ve found that we human creatures are often pretty poor at recognizing our achievements and celebrating them. So here are a few questions to help surface up some of that good stuff!

1. What worked really well in 2018?

2. What actions did I take that served others?

3. What am I most proud of?

4. When I look back throughout 2018, what makes me smile?

5. Who entered my life in 2018 that brings me joy?

6. What did I do that I didn’t think I could do?

In tomorrow’s post, I’ll share a tool you can use to get clarity on those things that you are putting up with, and we’ll take steps to get rid of them once and for all!

In the meantime, enjoy the last few days of 2018 as you get ready to ring in a brand new year, full of opportunity, learning and potential!

Anchoring Your Success

Attitude – I asked the audience at a recent business meeting how many of them had created a clear, written definition of success for their business or career. Less than 25% of them raised their hand. When I probed a bit further with a few of them, what I found was that they tended to be using the stereotypical definitions of success, such as lots of money or a big house, usually posited by other so-called successful people.

Of course, borrowing a definition from someone else until you figure out your own is fine. In fact, I recommend you borrow mine until you have taken some time to work one out for yourself.

However, holding on to someone else’s determination of success without truly seeing if and how it fits in with your integrity is likely to create all sorts of square pegs in round holes for you.

You see, your personal definition of success will anchor your actions and give you a point of reference. Not having a point of reference that comes from within you may be behind some of the overwhelm and overload you feel.

So, here’s my definition –

I feel successful when I have more want-to’s in my day than have-to’s.

You’ll notice a couple of important things about that definition.

First, I talk of success as a feeling, not a possession. Thoughts and feelings drive our behaviour, and they need to form the basis of our performance goals, which ultimately creates our success.

Second, I mention nothing about money, relationships, position or status. When my days are filled with want to’s, I know I’ve made choices based on my personal and professional integrity about who I spend time with and how. I make those choices fully accepting responsibility for what happens and then my days naturally fill with want-to’s.

And guess what? Those days usually lead to the more common definitions of success about money, people and position.

Action – If you don’t have a written definition of what success feels like to you, start with mine. Then, over the next few days, ask yourself how you really want to feel as that successful person. Then also ask yourself to what extent you already are successful (because you are) and how you feel about that.

As you understand what success feels like for you, you make it more possible to achieve.

Further reading:
On performance goals – here and here
On success – here
Another definition of success – here

True Success, Emerson Style

One of my favorite pieces of prose comes from Ralph Waldo Emerson who answers better than I the question “how do you define success?”

Here it is –

To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.

This is to have succeeded.

Action – Take what you need from his definition of success. Tweak it, play with it, and change it around. Most of all, integrate it into your daily life.

As you create and live your own definition, you’ll actually begin to make it happen.

Happy New Year – Part 3

Happy New Year – Part 2

Happy New Year – Part 1

Anchoring Your Success

True Success, Emerson Style

Recent Posts

Archives

Recent Comments