Don’t Tell Me Why

One of the simplest ways to move closer to the success you seek is to change the way you talk about it. The language you use determines the success you achieve.

In psychological terms, there are many phrases and words that impact your levels of motivation, persistence, and enthusiasm. The one I want to share with you today is the word “Why”.

This is one of the shortest yet most destructive words we could possibly use. As kids, we used the “why” question to help us make sense of the world, but as adults, “why” often begins a question that invariably causes us to remember bad situations or go on the defense.

• Why did you do that?
• Why doesn’t it work the way I want it to?
• Why should they get all the glory?
• Why can’t I do better?

Just like a computer search engine, our minds will look for the answer to any question we ask of it. So when our questions are framed in the negative, as most “why” questions are, our minds will usually uncover a negative answer.

Why can’t I do this better? Because I don’t have the education, money or intelligence. Because I fail at this stuff all the time. Because I’m a dweeb.

Maybe you don’t consciously respond so pessimistically all the time but “why” often generates a negative at some level.

Action – Start your questions in a way that encourages the brain to find a solution rather than an excuse or reason. Begin questions, either to yourself or to others, with the words when, what or how. When can I commit to finalizing this? What 3 things can we alter to improve the performance? How many people are needed to implement the new plan?

Start as you mean to go on – with powerful solutions and motivation.

(What is the ‘why’ question that you often ask yourself? Share with others by leaving your reply in the comments box.)