Reframing is the art of changing your perspective or attitude in a way that motivates you to take another step.
I’m wondering – how could you reframe win and lose?
Do you like to win? If so, did you know that the need to win actually blocks success?
If we borrow from the science of physics for a moment, we’ll see that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Well, the same holds true for attitudes and opinions.
When you win, you feel great and say wonderful things about yourself. But if you lose, it is likely that your internal language is harsh and negative.
And if it is, then when you do win, you’ve not been motivated by a positive driver. You’ve simply been motivated to avoid the loss.
Jack was perceived as being highly successful. He landed all the business deals, seemed to have healthy relationships and managed to keep up the appearance of being happy. Yet he wasn’t. He was so motivated not to lose that he couldn’t enjoy his wins.
Jack could never appreciate what he had achieved because he was driven only to avoid negatives. It works, but eventually avoiding negatives will burn you out.
And Jack is not an extreme case. Far from it actually.
But when Jack reframed win/lose into simply pursuing his personal best with integrity, he was able to relax and enjoy his life’s accomplishments. Not surprisingly, he became even more successful!
Action – Take something you need to win at, like a business deal, a game of golf or out-gossiping the next guy. Reframe your position into something less black/white … less either/or.
Then live it.
(Agree, disagree or otherwise have a thought on the matter? Please leave your reply in the comments box.)